Comments by: YACCS

Fall, Glimmer, Sparkle and Fade

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D
Phoe
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:: Saturday, December 20, 2003 ::

Live Nude Girls! Or Not...

The first non-music list in quite some time, courtesy of Deirdre:
Live, from New York, its the next Top 5!! What is the Ryno's Top 5 favorite sketches from SNL?

Actually, it's live from Connecticut, but who am I to argue? I already know I'm going to get plenty of negative feedback with this one. Mainly because I'm not a huge fan of the 'old school' Saturday Night Live, meaning anything pre-late 80's is not really my thing. I'm sorry, but the early 90's casts of Dana Carvey, Chris Farley, Phil Hartman, Mike Myers, Kevin Nealon, Time Meadows, Adam Sandler, David Spade and Co. were the best they ever had. Even after the 'blockbuster' cast started breaking up, SNL has always been able to maintain a pretty solid lineup. Unfortunately the best actors they've had recently -- Will Ferrell and Tracy Morgan -- have both jumped ship. With that being said, here are -- in my humble opinion -- the best sketches Saturday Night Live has ever had to offer.
*Links will bring you to full transcripts courtesy of SNL Transcripts, the best site for the show on the net*

1. Celebrity Jeopardy
- These never got old and it's a shame that I haven't seen them make a new one in quite some time. Hopefully even though Will Ferrell is gone, they'll get someone else to play Alex Trebek so we no longer have to be deprived of the best skit ever. Darrell Hammond as Sean Connery was absolutely priceless: "I've got to ask you about the Penis Mightier." A close second was Norm MacDonald as Burt Reynolds, or "Turd Ferguson" as he preferred to be called. Other quality appearances were by Ben Stiller as Tom Cruise, Drew Barrymore as Calista Flockhart and Tobey Maguire as Keanu Reeves. It doesn't get any better than this kids.

2. Wayne's World
- Mike Myers and Dana Carvey both had great careers, but they both land on the list here because together Wayne's World was stronger than anything they did by themselves. This skit even spawned the best of the Saturday Night Live movies. Yes, those films were better than "A Night at the Roxbury", "Coneheads" and the other 'classics'. Party on, Wayne. Party on, Garth. I'm truly not worthy.

3. Matt Foley: Motivational Speaker
- The late Chris Farley was, hands down, one of the best all-time actors this show every had. His Matt Foley skits come in right behind The Chris Farley Show; To Paul McCartney: "You remember when you were in the Beatles? That was cool!". You can tell a character is good if the other actors can't stop themselves from laughing during the skit, even though they've been through it countless times during the week. I've never seen actors crack up during a skit more than with Chris Farley as Matt Foley. Matt Foley also made an appearance as 'Motivational Santa' and 'Bilingual Motivational Speaker'... Pure genius.

4. The Ladies Man
- And freeze! Tim Meadows might have been on SNL for close to 28 years, but along the way he established one of the best characters in the history of the show (no matter how bad the movie was). The premier moment had to be Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson in full drag as Leon's newest 'love interest'. And the Ladies Man quote of all quotes: "Oh yeah.. well, um.. when I said 'dinner', what I meant was, uh, we'd be having sex. And, uh, when I said 'movie', I meant we'd be videotaping it." Come back Tim Meadows, come back.

5. Brian Fellow's Safari Planet
- The most recent of the sketches on the list and Tracy Morgan's best character. This was one of the last top shelf recurring skits they had left, but now that Tracy has moved on to his own soon-to-be-cancelled sitcom we no longer get the pleasure of seeing Brian Fellow, who is very special. "That bird better PRAY he don't screw up my credit!" That's Crazy!

:: Ryan 3:10 AM [+] ::
...
:: Tuesday, December 16, 2003 ::
Voices Carry

Quick and to the point from Phoe:
Top 5 vocalists. Top 5 vocalists. Basically, whose voice do you like?

I've had a few people ask "wouldn't the list just be made up of your favorite artists?" Yes, that's a very rational question, but when have you read anything on this site that has even approached being rational? The simple answer I gave is that there are a lot of bands/artists that I love but who don't necessarily have the most dynamic voices. Not having a particularly good voice myself, I have so much respect for those that can belt out a tune. So I present to you the five voices I am most envious of. Enjoy.

1. Raine Maida, Our Lady Peace
- I remember the first time I heard an OLP song, it was "Superman's Dead" and my first thought was "there's no way this voice could work over the course of an entire album." Well, when I'm wrong, I'm wrong. Even after I bought -- and fell in love with -- their albums, I somehow thought there had to be some studio smoke and mirrors act going on. That summer I had a chance to see them in concert and I figured I could finally hear what this man's voice sounds like outside the confines of a studio. Not only did the performance match the album, but it surpassed it by leaps and bounds. Incredible.

2. Jude Christodal
- When I first saw Jude in concert, I had no idea who he was. He was the first of two opening acts for Better Than Ezra and you wouldn't necessarily have thought much about him just by his looks. Or at least I didn't. He was just this skinny guy with an acoustic guitar, but I was floored by the sounds he was able to get out of that little body of his. If you are not familiar with this man and his music, you need to be. His new album will be available shortly, but in the meantime you can go to your favorite record store and purchase his first three.

3. Roger Clyne, The Refreshments/Roger Clyne and the Peacemakers
- Very few singers can pull off silly pop songs as well as epic ballads. Roger Clyne is one of those few. Simply listen to the Refreshments big hit "Banditos" and then go and d\l a song called "Nada" and you will be a believer too. Roger tells some of the best stories in his songs and his voice helps to bring you right there with him.

4. Kevin Griffin, Better Than Ezra
- His voice has definitely gotten better with age. With each BTE album, Kevin's voice has been progressing almost as well as his song writing has. The tracks on their latest album, 'Closer', are light years ahead of their first couple albums, which weren't too shabby either.

5. Chris Cornell, Soundgarden/Audioslave
- To carry one mega-rock group? Impressive. To carry a second mega-rock group? Amazing. It takes some mighty strong pipes to do what Chris Cornell has done. Not to mention the fact that he also managed to put together one hell of a solo album along the way.

:: Ryan 7:36 PM [+] ::
...
:: Tuesday, December 09, 2003 ::
'Tis The Season

Deirdre once again manages to come up with a great list that I can mess up:
In the spirit of the season -- well it's actually because I've been listening to Christmas music since mid-November -- Give up the Ryno's Top 5 Christmas songs. Oldies, re-makes, new ones. Whatever floats your boat.

I am admittedly not a huge fan of the 'classic' Christmas music. I don't look forward to having to hear old school "Jingle Bell Rock" fifty times in the span of the 24 hours that is Christmas day. Don't get me wrong, I love Christmas, I'm just not the type that needs the accompanying soundtrack for every season. However, oddly enough I really like a lot of the more contemporary Christmas music. Re-makes as well as original songs from newer artists. Nothing against Bing Crosby or anything.

1. Fountains of Wayne "I Want an Alien for Christmas"
- C'mon who doesn't want an alien for Christmas? Oh. Really, you don't? Well, I do or at least when I was younger I would have rather had a little green guy with 17 eyes that knows how to fly than a new bike. When you and your family/friends are hanging out around the holidays and there's some Christmas music in the background, just throw this one on. I mean, it's not "Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer", but what is? Most definitely the best of the newer original Christmas songs.

2. Blink 182 "I Won't Be Home For Christmas"
- I really like Christmas, I promise. But I think everyone is in agreement that there are those certain moments when you'd like to take a baseball bat to someone's head. Obviously such an act would be a horrible, horrible decision so instead you can put this song on and live vicariously through Blink 182. There's no need to go to jail over someone else's stupidity, especially around the holidays.

3. Everclear "Hating you for Christmas"
- I swear I don't have a problem with Christmas. This title is just a bit deceiving because it's about looking back on many amazing holidays. It just happens that the person those holidays were spent with isn't so much around anymore. And I think everyone has experienced that super awkward moment when you run into that one person around the holidays that you would much rather not see. Throw this one on and think Merry Christmas!

4. Bruce Springsteen "Santa Claus is Coming to Town"
- The Boss is as classic as this list is going to get and that's just fine by me. Bruce should record a whole bunch of songs for each holiday to make seasonal radio much more bearable. Plus, this is the best way for the little kids to learn about Bruce. As much as we might like to have them listen to "Thunder Road" and the like, they need to be eased into the greatness that is the Boss.

5. Phantom Planet "Winter Wonderland"
- You can check this one out on the 'Maybe This Christmas' album that was released last year. This is the best cut off the album, which is saying a lot when Coldplay, Bright Eyes, Jack Johnson and Ben Folds also have songs on the disc. You can check out a small snippet of this track on Amazon. I think I like it so much because it's not the version you would expect from them at all. The boys of PP put their own stamp on the song without trying to make it sound like an extension of their own album. If that makes any sense. Probably not.

Happy Holidays!

:: Ryan 8:58 PM [+] ::
...
:: Saturday, December 06, 2003 ::
Say Cheese!

After a long wait, I would like to thank Phoe for this one:
Top five cheesy but good songs.

The next few lists will be the calm before the storm with the Top 20 Albums of 2003 on the way. Please keep the album suggestions coming so that I don't miss any of the best records from the past year. This list was a ton of fun to do though. Everyone interprets 'cheesy' differently, I think of cheesy songs being along the lines of goofy or off the wall. You might have a different interpretation and that's cool, just leave a note on what should have made it into the top 5.

1. Ben Folds Five "For Those of Ya'll Who Wear Fannie Packs"
- These guys had their fair share of goofy tunes, but this one takes the cake. This is a track that you need to take a listen to. No matter how you feel about Ben Folds -- with or without the five -- you truly need to download this song. This is just Ben, Robert and Jesse's way to pay homage to the weekend warriors that evidently feel a need to carry everything they own in a little fannie pack. The fact that this was all done on the fly makes it that much more impressive.

I said for those of ya'll with fannie packs
This song's coming out, it's coming at ya!
I wanna borrow an Alan wrench
I wanna borrow some duct tape
I wanna borrow a mic cable


2. Self "Trunk Fulla Amps"
- If you have never heard this song, this is another one you need to go and download right now. You can get it here. Even if you don't like or haven't ever heard of Self, I can promise you this is the real deal. Again, it's not so much the usual definition of 'cheesy', but off the wall it most definitely is. How many bands could manage to squeeze references to Lenny Kravitz, Freddy Mercury, Glen Danzig and ELO into one song?

I've got amps from sellin' stamps, motherfucker
Like Glen Danzig, mother-fucker


3. Tenacious D "Tribute"
- It's a pleasure anytime I can put the self-proclaimed greatest and best band in the world on a list. Especially when said song is a tribute to the greatest and best song in the world from the greatest and best band in the world. C'mon, there aren't many times when you hear the words "off the wall" without Jack Black and KG following right behind them. I prefer the version from their HBO series to the one on the album because there's a little bit of "Stairway to Heaven" thrown in the middle, but both are just plain classic.

We played the first thing that came to our heads
Just so happened to be The Best Song in the World
It was The Best Song in the World

And the peculiar thing is this my friends
The song we sang on that fateful night
It didn't actually sound anything like this song
This is just a tribute


4. Bloodhound Gang "Mope"
- I'm pretty sure I could put any of their songs here and it would make sense. For example, I could've went with "A Lap Dance Is So Much Better When The Stripper Is Crying", "Kiss Me Where It Smells Funny", "Magna Cum Nada", "She Ain't Got No Legs" or "You're Pretty When I'm Drunk". But I decided "Mope" was the best choice mainly because you wouldn't know there was anything funky going on here by the title, unlike the others I mentioned. Plus, any song dedicated to Falco is fine by me. Pac-Man also has a cameo. Yes, Pac-Man. Enough said.

Tried to O.D. on the Cold-Eeze
Golden Girls got me Sweatin' To The Oldies
Hangin out like double Ds, sip Long Island Iced Teas
Wrote to Mayor McCheese "Send a Shamrock Shake please?"

I dial the wrong number hope a conversation starts
I mean I might as well be listenin' to Journey
Givin' myself a mullet hook the Flowbee to the Kirby
Make a prank call pretendin' I'm a mime
Get stuck in traffic just to pass the time


5. Zebrahead "Playmate of the Year"
- I'm a fan of these guys and definitely think they're one of the better punk bands out there. This masterpiece probably isn't what they'll want to be remembered by, but it's a great tune nonetheless. This is an anthem for teen boys everywhere around the world.

Hello, how are you?
It's great to see you too
Let's grab a sock, it's time to rock
And afterwards you never wanna talk


:: Ryan 4:48 AM [+] ::
...
:: Monday, December 01, 2003 ::
I took Thanksgiving off, but the next list will be up this weekend. However, more importantly, it's the end of the year which means it's almost time for the Top 20 Albums of 2003. I'd like everyone to leave a list of their favorites and maybe a few albums I might have missed. The only condition is that is had to have been released in 2003 (duh!).

You can check out my Top 20 of 2002, as well as a look back at 2001 by clicking on the archive link for January of this year. Suggest away.


:: Ryan 8:04 PM [+] ::
...
:: Saturday, November 22, 2003 ::
I Wish I May, I Wish I Might

Just when I thought D couldn't get any better with her lists:
As a lover of music, what are the Top 5 songs you wish you wrote.

This was most definitely the best list suggestion to date. I'm certainly not saying it's my best work by any means, but I gave it the old college try as I always do. These songs should not be mistaken for my favorite songs of all time. Because -- for example -- "Piano Man" by Billy Joel is one of my favorite songs, but I would have zero business writing such a classic. I had the same reaction for each of the following tracks the first time I heard them: "Holy shit, this is so damn good why didn't I think of it first?" I would be honored to have written any of the following songs. Because this is a 'special' list, I've included all the lyrics to each selection.


1. Third Eye Blind "God of Wine"
- This, more than any of the others on the list, is here equally because of the music and the lyrics. It is one of the most beautifully crafted songs on the guitar I have ever heard. Kevin Cadogen -- the now ex-3eb guitarist -- put together the perfect landscape for Stephan Jenkins' lyrics. There isn't a time I hear this song -- live or from CD -- that the hair doesn't stand up on the back of my neck. I can only dream of one day writing a song that is as perfectly put together as this one.

Every thought that I repent
There's another chip you haven't spent
And you're cashing them all in
Where do we begin to get clean again
Can we get clean again

I walk home alone with you
And the mood you're born into
Sometimes you let me in
And I take it on the chin
I can't get clean again
I want to know can we get clean again

The God of Wine comes crashing through
The headlights of a car that took you farther
Than you thought you'd ever want to go
We can't get back again

She takes a drink and then she waits
The alcohol it permeates
And soon the cells give way, and cancels out the day
I can't keep it all together
I know I know I know...
I can't keep it all together

And the siren's song that is your madness
Holds a truth I can't erase
All alone on your face
Every glamorous sunrise
Throws the planets out of line
A star sign out of whack, a fraudulent zodiac

And the God of Wine is crouched down in my room
You let me down, I said it, now I'm going down
And you're not even around
And I said no no no...
I can't keep it all together
I know I know I know...
I can't keep it all together

And there's a memory of a window
Looking through I see you
Searching for something I could never give you
And there's someone who understands
You more than I do
A sadness I can't erase
All alone on your face


2. Josh Joplin Group "Camera One"
- The line 'Its funny how life turns out/The odds of faith in the face of doubt' will always resonate in my mind when I think about this song. Such a simple line, but obviously not simple enough for me to come up with! Josh Joplin hit an absolute home run with this one. The inspiration of the song is obvious and while I don't envy what he must have had to go through to write this, I think we can all relate to this song. Isn't that the best part of being a songwriter, when someone can relate to something you've written? Josh, take a bow.

The sandy haired son of Hollywood
Lost his faith in all that's good
Closed the curtain, unplugged the clock
Hung his clothes on the shower rod
But he never got undressed
And no, he never made a mess

It's funny how life turns out
The odds of faith in the face of doubt
Camera One closes in
The soundtrack starts
The scene begins

You're playing you now
Take a bow

The trophy wife from Palisades
Whose yearbook beauty never fades
Sits and watches the sea fold in
And wonders what might have been
If she could ever have the chance
Would she do it all again?

It's funny how life turns out
The odds of faith in the face of doubt
Camera One closes in
The soundtrack starts
The scene begins

You're playing you now
Take a bow

On the corner, by his streets
He sits in his lawn chair in the heat
Sightseers see what they want
They're selling star-maps to the sun

The sunny-haired son of Hollywood
Lost his faith in all that's good
Closed the curtain, unplugged the clock
Hung his clothes on the shower rod
But he didn't get undressed
And no, he didn't seem depressed

It's funny how life turns out
The odds of faith in the face of doubt
Camera One closes in
The soundtrack starts
The scene begins

You're playing you now
Take a bow


3. Flickerstick "Coke"
- No, it's not that coke. You might know the band or at least recognize the name -- they won VH1's Bands on the Run -- but you most likely don't know the song. And that's a shame because this is a band that was never really given a fair shake by their label (and my former employer) Epic Records. Not only is this a perfectly written song, but it rocks. If you watched them on VH1, then you already know they can most definitely rock with the best of them. And now you will hopefully find out their song writing isn't too shabby either.

Says she's got another life
That I am living in my friend
Through and through she says
It's nothing I can change
I always was the one

The celebration ends without a sound
And the friends they're not around
And you find you're all alone
Talking to yourself again
You promised it's the end
Just one night you'll be fine
Cause in the end the dreams you dream
Are all you ever were

She's got another life
That I am living in my friend
Through and through she says
It's nothing I can change
I always was the one and I'll say
Come on I'd like to buy the world a Coke and lie here naked with my girl

The lights dim once again someday I'll sleep
Cause it's all the same to me
This tiny voice inside my head keeps me awake
Come on lets find the cure
Come on lets die until we live
In the end you'll find how high you climbed
There's no design to ever bring you down

And she knows..


4. John Mayer "Something's Missing"
- So many bands can put together great songs, but John is one of the lucky few in this world that can write every aspect of a great song himself. Not only are these -- again -- lyrics many people can relate to, but he's an amazing guitarist. Unlike many guitar phenoms, however, you won't here any of the unneeded clutter that some add just for the sake of showing off their skills. If you simply sit back and listen you will hear the beauty of his craft.

I'm not alone, I wish I was
Cause then I'd know, I was down because I couldn't find
A friend around to love me like they do right now
They do right now

I'm dizzy from the shopping malls
I searched for joy, but I bought it all
It doesn't help the hunger pains
and a thirst I'd have to drown first to ever satiate

Something's missing
And I don't know how to fix it
Something's missing
And I don't know what it is at all

When autumn comes, it doesn't ask
It just walks in, where it left you last
And you never know, when it starts
Until there's fog inside the glass around your summer heart

Something's missing
And I don't know how to fix it
Something's missing
And I don't know what it is at all

I can't be sure that this state of mind, is not of my own design
I wish there was an over the counter test, for loneliness
For loneliness like this

Something's missing
And I don't know how to fix it
Something's missing
And I don't know what it is
No I don't know what it is
Something's different
And I don't know what it is
No I don't know what it is

Friends -check- Money -check- Well slept -check- Opposite sex -check- Guitar -check- Microphone -check- Messages waiting for me, when I come home -check-

How come everything I think I need, always comes with batteries
What do you think it means


5. Coldplay "The Scientist"
- I can hear Jack Black's character from High Fidelity with this one: "Ooh, kind of a new record. A sly declaration of new classic-status slipped into a list of old classics. Nice, very pussy." Obviously none of the other four are exactly 'old classics', but none the less the other four have all been in my music collection one way or another longer than this one. I'm also admittedly not as crazy about Coldplay as the rest of the world, but out of all of Chris Martin's songs, this is the one I most wish my name was attached to.

Come up to meet you, tell you I'm sorry
You don't know how lovely you are

I had to find you
Tell you I need you
Tell you I set you apart

Tell me your secrets
And ask me your questions
Oh let's go back to the start

Running in circles
Coming up tails
Heads on a silence apart

Nobody said it was easy
It's such a shame for us to part
Nobody said it was easy
No one ever said it would be this hard

Oh take me back to the start

I was just guessing
At numbers and figures
Pulling your puzzles apart

Questions of science
Science and progress
Do not speak as loud as my heart

Tell me you love me
Come back and haunt me
Oh and I rush to the start

Running in circles
Chasing our tails
Coming back as we are

Nobody said it was easy
Oh it's such a shame for us to part
Nobody said it was easy
No one ever said it would be so hard

I'm going back to the start



:: Ryan 5:52 AM [+] ::
...
:: Saturday, November 15, 2003 ::
Not So Quiet In The Back

Phoe and D are alternating. Meaning Phoe is up:
Top 5 songs according to background vocals ;)

Hey, this was one of the hardest one to finish so far. How many times do you listen to a song and say "wow, those background vocals really kick ass man!" Oh. Really? Okay, well you might say that, but I certainly don't. That's why this was a great list suggestion, because I had to listen to songs in a way I never had before. I'm sure I missed plenty of very obvious songs, so leave your choices in the comments. More list suggestions are also welcomed. Enjoy.

1. Ben Folds "Not the Same (Live)"
- The audience is a major part of this one. Now it's not like a lot of live songs where people sing along because they know the words. Not at all. Ben goes through the different harmonies with the entire crowd before the song and gestures when they should come in throughout the song. That earns him the number one spot on this list. How can you beat 1,500 people singing backup every single night?

2. Pearl Jam "Jeremy"
- I was never a huge PJ fan. I know, I know. I'm a horrible human being. Save it, I've heard it allll before. But this had to make the list. The best part of this song is the last chorus when there are three or four different vocal tracks going on. You can tell just how important those vocals are when you hear them play this live, because Vedder does them all himself so you miss out on the different layers. He's forced to do one, then the next, then the next. Even though it's a great song, the backing vocals really hold this up throughout.

3. Billy Joel "Still Rock and Roll to Me"
- Just like Vedder handles the majority of the backing vocals with "Jeremy", Billy takes care of everything here. It's great to hear him answer his own questions: "What's the matter with the clothes I'm wearing"... "Can't you tell that your tie is too wide?" Who needs back up singers? Not Billy.

4. The Police "Every Breath You Take"
- This should have been the first song that popped into my head when I started this list. Not because it's the best song with background vocals (it's number 4, duh!), but because it's an obvious choice. Even if for some God forsaken reason you're only familiar with the version that P. Sean Daddy, it has to be fairly obvious to you as well. This is another track that is held up from start to finish with the strong vocals in the back. I'd like to congratulate Gordy on his first list appearance. I'm sure he's flattered.

5. USA for the Africa "We Are The World"
- I was baited into this one. After Phoe posted the list, I had several people mention to me that this song had to be at the top of the list. I'm pretty sure most of them were just joking, but I couldn't resist. Harry Belafonte started the whole USA for Africa project and brought in the likes of Michael Jackson, Bob Dylan, Bruce Springsteen and Willie Nelson. C'mon, look at that lineup! It's the Yankees of the music industry. Plus, anything produced by Quincy Jones will always have a home on one of my lists.


:: Ryan 5:30 AM [+] ::
...
:: Saturday, November 08, 2003 ::
Sexual Healing

Wow, D has out done herself this time:
*say this in a Barry White voice. It's sexier*
What are the Ryno's Top 5 songs to make out to? (I think that's what the kids are calling it these days)


Even before D posted this one, she told me I would have fun with it. She was dead on, putting this together was a good time. Now if you ever need to throw on a few tunes to 'set the mood', just burn these five songs and let the magic begin! Don't mistake this for a love song list, because I think we all know that the best love songs certainly don't always make good mood music. As always, these should be played in order.

1. Jack Black "Let's Get It On"
- This is a perfect start. It's amusing -- simply because it's Jack Black -- so it helps to break the ice, but at the same time it's a super sexy song. What girl -- or guy if that's your thing -- wouldn't get in the mood with this one? If you feel the need, then you can replace it with Mavin Gaye's version, but I see no need. It is the greatest and best love making song in the world.

I've been really tryin, baby
Tryin to hold back these feelings for so long
And if you feel, like I feel baby
Come on, oh come on
Let's get it on


2. Goo Goo Dolls "Slide"
- Now you can't just jump right into the super slow love making (that is what the kids are calling it, right?) songs just yet. So this helps to transition from Jack Black to the much slower songs. Not only do girls dig John Rzeznik, but he has said in interviews this song is a teenage sex anthem (or something along those lines). Why don't you slide into my room.

3. John Mayer "Comfortable"
- Girls might dig John Rzeznik, but they loooooove John Mayer. Especially when he's singing this one. I've seen him live a handful of times and whenever he pulls this one out, every girl in the place nearly faints. Now the more obvious choice here would be "Your Body is a Wonderland", but "Let's Get It On" took home the one and only blatantly obvious spot on this list. If you're this far into the list and still haven't gotten anywhere, then I'm sorry to say that things aren't looking very good. Luckily you have a couple more songs to rely on.

4. Roger Clyne and the Peacemakers "Green and Dumb"
- Okay, so this is where you can officially go in for the 'kill'. The first three were recognizable tracks to set the mood and get the ball rolling. Now you can use this beautiful epic of a song as background music as you take care of business (seriously, is that what the kids are calling it now a days?). This really is an amazing cut from Roger Clyne (formally of the Refreshments) and Co. Trust me with this one. You can thank me later.

5. Guster "Either Way"
- I'll be the first to admit that this song makes no sense from a lyrical standpoint. It's not a love song and it isn't a love making song. There's just something about this song when it's played in a room that is lit only by the sunset or moon. Plus, by song five if you're worrying about the lyrics of a song then you probably aren't doing very well. C'mon, pay attention to what you're doing!


:: Ryan 4:53 AM [+] ::
...
:: Sunday, November 02, 2003 ::
Here Comes the Music

It's Phoe's turn:
Okay... I asked top 5 for your funeral last time. How about top 5 for your wedding?

The "didn't I just do this list?" jokes are there for the taking, but I'll let them be. At 22 I am years away from the wedding chapel (God willing), but it certainly never hurts to plan ahead. This list will most definitely change over time, so I put it together as if I were going to need it sometime in the near future.

1. Ben Folds "The Luckiest"
- I have said that Jude's "I Do" is the greatest love song ever written -- which I stand by -- but that is a song about love lost and this is a song about love found. If "I Do" is love song 1, this is 1a. It's one thing to write amazing music or lyrics, but Ben has a way of doing both like no other. In this case he put together an absolutely beautiful song that I promise will make any bride cry on the dance floor.

I don't get many things right the first time
In fact, I am told that a lot
Now I know all the wrong turns
The stumbles and falls brought me here
And where was I before the day that I first saw your lovely face
Now I see it everyday and I know
That I am the luckiest


2. Better Than Ezra "At the Stars"
- This certainly isn't a song you'll hear while dancing -- slow or otherwise -- but it has to be played. It deals with those moments when nothing else in the world matters. I hear those times are a big reason why people want to get married in the first place. So if you can't relate to this song then what the hell are you getting married for?

It's three o'clock and we're driving in your car
You're screaming out the window at the stars
Please don't drive me home


3. Everclear "Good Witch of the North"
- C'mon, it's been three or four lists since I've used one of their songs so you had to know they were around the corner. Plus, this is a song that promises marriage. If you believe Jerry Maguire then you have to find someone that can 'complete' you. Well, this song is a round about way of saying 'you complete me'.

My good lover is my one good thing these days
You help me keep it all from slipping away
I swear I'm going to marry you someday


4. U2 "Unchained Melody"
- This is a song that's going to be played anyways, so it might as well be the best version out there. Don't get me wrong, it's an amazing song no matter who performs it, but there's something about Bono's vocals that just isn't there with the Righteous Brothers (I mean no disrespect, so please keep the hate mail to yourself). If you've ever heard U2's version you know what I mean.

I need your love
God speed your love to me


5. Travis "Flowers in the Window"
- Lead singer Fran Healy said in concert that he wrote this song after one of the band members almost died. Oddly enough though, the song has nothing to do with death. He says after he thought the worst for his friend/bandmate he went to his room and this is what came out. A great song about finding that one person and growing old together. Go figure.

It's such a lovely day and I'm glad you feel the same
Cause to stand up, out in the crowd
You are one in a million
And I love you so
Lets watch the flowers grow




:: Ryan 1:25 AM [+] ::
...
:: Saturday, October 25, 2003 ::
Stripped

Deirdre got all fancy with this one:
a-cous-tic
1. Of or being an instrument that does not produce or enhance sound electronically: an acoustic guitar; an acoustic bass.
2. Being a performance that features such instruments

Top 5 Acoustic Songs. Go.


When the acoustic sound became the thing to like, it was either fans wanting to hear their favorite electric songs done a different way or them demanding a band have an acoustic ballad. I've always been a fan of both the stripped down versions (thus the title) and the occasional ballad. So I tried to mix and match here. My junior year of college I did a weekly four hour radio show of all acoustic songs, so I went through the hundreds of acoustic MP3s I have and was able to spit out these five. Enjoy.

1. Foo Fighters "Everlong"
- I truly believe this song started the new wave of the acoustic 'revolution'. After Dave Grohl performed this on the Howard Stern show, K-Rock started playing that version in place of the album cut. Every station, it seemed, across the country then started doing the same thing. Hearing an acoustic version of a song was now more and more common. Bands started offering acoustic versions of their hits as added-values and would even play a song twice in concert: electric and acoustic. I attribute all of that to this song. I can't fault the entire country for falling in love with this version because it's absolutely incredible. The song was transformed from a kick ass rock song in to a tortured love song. Don't get me wrong, the album version is awesome but the emotion of the song wasn't properly conveyed until it was performed acoustic.

I wonder
When I sing along with you
If every thing could ever be this real forever
If anything could ever be this good again
The only thing I'll ever ask of you
You've got to promise not to stop when I say when


2. Fountains of Wayne "...Baby, One More Time"
- I've been a fan of FoW for about seven years or so and this surfaced shortly after their self-titled debut album came out. Since then I've heard plenty of crappy punk bands do horrible versions -- is a horrible version of a Britney Spears song an oxymoron? -- and I've heard a decent version that Travis put together, but everything pales in comparison to this. These guys not only make this song sound good in a novelty sort of way but in a -- dare I say it -- good song sort of way! If you had never seen Britney dancing in a high school hallway mouthing -- get those dirty thoughts out of your mind -- the words to this and only heard Fountains of Wayne's version, you just might think it's a quality song. I know, I know. I sound crazy. Just give it a listen and decide.

My loneliness is killing me
I must confess I still believe
When I'm not with you I lose my mind
Give me a sign


3. Matchbox Twenty "Time After Time"
- Hey, it's two covers in a row! This has been a staple of their live show from the very beginning. For a while it was one of two songs lead singer Rob Thomas played guitar on ("Hang" was the other). I heard this for the first time at the Hammerstein Ballroom in NYC back when they were in the middle of their first big tour. I was there with my girlfriend at the time and when Rob came out and played this, we both felt it was easily the highlight of the night. It's just him and an acoustic guitar and during the chorus the lead guitarist -- Kyle Cook -- comes in to help out with the vocals. Similar to Fountains of Wayne, they really make this song their own. I don't think cheesy 80's hit when I hear this.

If you're lost you can look
And you will find me
Time after time
If you fall I will catch you
I'll be waiting
Time after time


4. Jimmy Eat World "No Sensitivity"
- I consider myself a Jimmy Eat World fan but I don't own any of their split EPs, which is where the original version of this song can be found (it was later included on various import singles as well). So I had never even heard this previous to one day when I did a search for "Acoustic" on Kazaa. I was looking for some new materiel for my radio show and just for my personal collection. Near the bottom of the screen I saw Jimmy Eat World and just assumed it would be "Lucky Denver Mint" or "The Middle" seeing how those was really there only hits up until that point. No, it's this song called "No Sensitivity" and so just out of curiosity I d\l it to give a listen. Wow. This is the perfect example of what an "acoustic" version of a song should be: A man(or woman) and his/her guitar. That's it. No layered guitars or extra vocal tracks. He sat down, picked up his guitar, pressed record and started playing. Similar to "Everlong", the acoustic version really does help you 'feel' the song more. I've since heard the studio and several live versions and while it's a great song either way, but the whole track feels stronger when stripped down.

Your problems they aren't problems
Be glad they never will
I'm taking my kisses back
I want my kisses back from you


5. Jude "I Do"
- This falls under the 'acoustic from the beginning' title. You can find a different version on each of his three albums. Only the first two are acoustic though. This appeared as a live cut on his first album 430 N. Harper Ave. titled "Cammie". On his second record No One Is Really Beautiful you can find the best version. I'll spill the beans and say that when the "Best Love Songs" list comes around, as much as I hate recycling songs, this is going to be number one. It's strength as an acoustic song is proven when he tries to put some beats behind it on King of Yesterday and it just didn't work. The lyrics are amazing no matter what he does with it, but all he needs to express them the right way is an acoustic guitar.

And if you're ever wondering if love can be true
Well, think of me and remember darling like I do
Old friendships fade away, love falls apart
And you've not spent a single day outside my heart
And there's just one more dream that I have left for you
I hope you're smiling when he turns around and says I do



:: Ryan 4:54 AM [+] ::
...
:: Saturday, October 18, 2003 ::
At Your Funeral

Thanks to Ms. Phoe for this one:
Top 5 songs you want played at your funeral. Yes.... I'm morbid.

Yikes, morbid is right. Now I wouldn't want the songs to be completely depressing, I mean a funeral in itself is depressing enough. But I also don't expect people rocking out to Tenacious D's "Tribute" either. So I attempted to mix and match slower songs with the more up tempo ones. As much as it might make sense to just play my favorite five songs, those obviously don't all deal with loss or even celebrating life. Here are my selections for this oh so very morbid list. The songs should be played in the order listed.

1. U2 "With or Without You"
- This comes to mind almost right away for every list if only because it's one of the greatest songs ever written. I immediately counted it out of this one though because I've never viewed it as a song about death. It is, however, most definitely a song about loss. And trying to cope with that loss. It is an absolutely beautiful song and really can set the tone for any other songs that will be played. The opening song should be solemn, which the beginning of this song most certainly is. Then it should also celebrate their life and how much they (or I in this case) meant to you along with how hard it will be to go on without them (see the title of the song). You must eventually come to grips with the fact that you are going to have to move on, even though in the back of your mind you think they (or again, I in this case) will come walking through the door any minute.

See the stone set in your eyes
See the thorn twist in your side
I wait for you
Sleight of hand and twist of fate
On a bed of nails she makes me wait
And I wait... without you


2. Jimmy Eat World "Hear You Me"
- This is the most contemporary song on the list, I thought about this one being the first song played, but it might just be too slow for that. Yes, too slow for a funeral. Well, too slow for mine anyways. Another absolutely beautiful song that I'm pissed I didn't write. He says so much with so little. So often you can tell that a song is just empty, but this one has so much raw emotion, it's incredible.

So what would you think of me now
So lucky, so strong, so proud?
I never said thank you for that
Now I'll never have a chance
May angels lead you in
Hear you me my friends
On sleepless roads, the sleepless go
May angels lead you in
And if you were with me tonight
I'd sing to you just one more time
A song for a heart so big
God couldn't let it live


3. Ben Folds Five "Don't Change Your Plans"
- Now I'm going all the way to the other side of the spectrum from "Hear You Me" with this one. Ben Folds has always had a way of saying things that just make sense, so why not look to him in time of death. Unlike the first two songs that are being played more for the people at the funeral to help them cope or something along those lines, this would be a song saying what I would want to say. Just making sure everyone remembers that obviously I don't want to be gone, but just know that you are all the reasons why.

All I really wanna say is you're the reason I wanna stay
But destiny is calling and won't hold and when my time is up I'm outta here
All I know is I've gotta be where my heart says I oughta be
It often makes no sense
In fact I never understand these things I feel
I love you, goodbye


4. Little John and Ryan Jones "Goin' Away"
- Okay, now I know what you're saying: "Ryan, isn't this indulging just a bit?" My answer to that is: of course! It's my funeral, isn't it supposed to be about me? Yea, that's what I thought. Now those of you that didn't know me a few years ago (and to those that don't know me at all), my friend John (see the comments of the ring tones list) and I wrote a handful of songs about 4 years ago or so. Most were just fun pop songs that were pretty silly, but this was one of the more serious ones. If my memory serves, John wrote the initial lyrics about a breakup, but the overall theme of the song is about not knowing where the hell you're going to go next. That feeling of being completely lost is appropriate here.

Lyrics will be placed here when I find the official lyric sheet.

5. The Refreshments "Mekong"
- The ultimate song to celebrate life. Sometimes it seems like you've traveled the world three times over (maybe you literally have) but there is never any reason to stop celebrating the gift of life. The perfect song to end on, not concentrating on the loss, but rather what you still have. Yes, it may seem like life sucks sometimes, but every so often you have to sit back lift your glass and toast to life.

Is it true it's always happy hour here?
If it is I'd like to stay a while
And as cliche as it sounds
I'd like to raise another round
And if your bottles empty
Help yourself to mine
Thank you for your time
And here's to life



:: Ryan 3:29 AM [+] ::
...
:: Saturday, October 11, 2003 ::
From Bad to Worse

This site is alive and kicking because of Deirdre:
Top 5 worst songs ever. Or should I Say Bottom 5! HA!

I know what you'll be thinking after you take a look at the list. "Where's the Culture Club, Barry Manilow and Warrant?" Putting together a small list of horrible songs would be impossible if I started looking through the 70's and 80's. Hell, even most of the 90's. Thus, this is going to be fairly contemporary. I obviously missed hundreds of God awful songs, so please share with the class.

1. Hilary Duff "Why Not?"
- Why not? I'll do better than tell you, I'll show you:
You always dress in yellow/When you want to dress in gold/Instead of listening to your heart/You do just what you're told/You keep waiting where you are/For what you'll never know/Let's just get into your car/And go, baby, go
Now I understand it isn't sweet little Hilary's fault for the lyrics. She doesn't write them. But unfortunately for her, that doesn't make the song any easier on the ears. I almost had to opt for "So Yesterday" and the very deep 'If the light is off then it isn't on' lyric, but "Why Not?" will have to do.

2. Sisqo "Thong Song"
- Here is a sample of Mr. Sisqo's 'classic cut':
I like it when the beat goes da na da na/Baby make your booty go da na da na/Girl I know you wanna show da na da na/That thong th thong thong thong/I like it when the beat goes da na da na/Baby make your booty go da na da na/Girl I know you wanna show da na da na/That thong th thong thong thong
I like the thong as much as the next guy (on girls that is, not on myself of course), but a) do we need a song about it and b) do we need every ugly girl under the sun showing the world theirs on the dance floor? I'm sure Sisqo's a great guy who just wanted to make a buck -- which he certainly made plenty off-- so good for him, but why do people still to this day need to hear this song? Let it go the way of "The Macarena". Please.

3. Hanson "MMMBop"
- These little fuckers ruined a whole summer for a lot of people. Every time you turned around you saw these blonde haired "kids" -- no one was quite sure if they were guys or girls -- running around on the TV singing that damn chorus. I am happy to see they're back with a new album and refuse to go away, I can respect that kind of ambition that goes along with trying to fight the label of one hit wonder. But I will forever reserve a little bit of hatred for them because of this waste of music.

4. Celine Dion "My Heart Will Go On"
- Hanson might have ruined a summer, but this damn song ruined an entire year. You couldn't go anywhere without hearing this awful, awful track. Not to mention that it was a part of an equally horrific movie that also refused to go quietly into the night. Whenever the 'Worst Artist' list comes around, she will most definitely be on it, but this is by far her worst song which is saying a ton. Why couldn't see be the one hitting the ice berg?

5. R. Kelly "Thoia Thoing"
- This is the most recent of the five. It's bad enough that he has sex with thirteen year olds -- and video tapes it nonetheless -- but he doesn't help his case any when he puts out a big steaming pile of crap like this. I also question if it was in his best interest to release a track about sexing someone up when that someone he's 'singing' about is probably half my age. Gross. Maybe he should have went with "I Still Believe I Can Fly".




:: Ryan 3:22 AM [+] ::
...
:: Tuesday, October 07, 2003 ::
Can you hear me now? Good.

I think we all know who it's from:
Your next assignment, should you chose to accept it, is to list your top 5 songs you'd consider for ring tones and why.

I get off easy with this one because I already have a song as my ring tone, so that will lock up the #1 slot. The next four were still difficult to come up with. I think I came up with some decent selections. Maybe not.

1. Counting Crows "Mr. Jones"
- C'mon you had to know this one was coming. As soon as I got my new fancy phone, I had to d\l this tone. Given, I find it to be much more amusing that others around me mainly because they don't make the association. Usually I find myself explaining it and then I get the "oh, now I get it. Your last name is Jones and your ring tone is 'Mr. Jones'". Yea, people are pretty slow. Now there's been a rumor flying around for years that this song is actually about Adam Duritz' penis. I bet you'll never listen to the song the same way again. Anyways, because of this potential 'special' meaning, I set it so that it's the tone anytime a female's name shows up on the call ID. I think it makes sense. But what do I know? Exactly.

2. Everclear "You Make Me Feel Like a Whore"
- I think it's pretty obvious there had to be an Everclear song on here. The only tone I've been able to find by them that works with my phone is Santa Monica. And it's a poor version at that. Even if I found a better version I don't think I'd want it as one of my tones, only because that would be even more predictable than using "Mr. Jones". If I had YMMFLW on my phone then I would get to have those wonderful conversations: "What song's that?" "You make me feel like a whore" "No need to get testy". It'd be great.

3. Quantum Leap Theme
- It's one of the best TV shows ever, so that should be reason enough for it to make the list. But on top of that the theme song is so damn catchy. Mike Post hasn't written a bad theme yet. I've been able to find tones for virtually every TV show (from "Chips" to "Blue's Clues"), but I can't track down even a bad muzak version of the Quantum Leap Theme. If you ever track one down that will work with a Verizon Wireless phone, drop me a line and I will be your best friend forever. Or at least until I d\l the tone.

4. Outkast "B.O.B. (Bombs Over Baghdad)"
- Okay, now please put all politics aside here (we're talking about ring tones for God's sake). This one would get a good laugh out of anyone. C'mon we all knew someone that gave a little rendition of "B.O.B." when all this crap with Iraq started to go down. Even with that aside, the Outkast camp is always a good choice for a ring tone because their stuff is fast paced and even -- dare I say it -- fun! Yes, I said Outkast was fun. It must be the Top 40 radio creeping into my brain. I mean 50 Cent is a catchy tone and all, but... it's 50 Cent. I don't get that feeling with Outkast.

5. Survivor "Eye of the Tiger"
- This one will bring the house down every time someone blows you up (as the kids like to say). One of the most recognizable guitar riffs turns into one of the most recognizable ring tones. That's right, Survivor is gonna make a huge comeback and it will all be thanks to a ring tone. You can't ignore that hook and it also sticks in your head, which leads to people humming it all day long and cursing you every time they do. Okay, maybe that's not how you want people to remember you throughout the day. But you can't deny the strength of the tone.


:: Ryan 4:04 AM [+] ::
...
:: Monday, September 29, 2003 ::

My life is rated R.
What is your life rated?

:: Ryan 7:34 PM [+] ::
...
:: Thursday, September 18, 2003 ::
MTV reported yesterday that Everclear has officially called it quits. You may or may not know that they have been my favorite band for quite some time and I'm obviously upset that they won't be making music together anymore. At the same time, I was talking to D about it and I'm far from surprised. Even a casual fan that has seen their behind the music knows they've come close to breaking up close to half a dozen times in the past. They were living on borrowed time. I've seen them live countless times and they always put on a great show with a ton of energy but you could just tell by watching them on stage together that they didn't really seem to like each other all that much. And I have much respect for Craig Montoya and Greg Eklund -- Everclear's bassist and drummer -- but this was always Art Alexakis' band. Art's solo albums will always have the Everclear sound.

I'm going to put together at least one big 'ole Everclear list, but I'd like some help in deciding just which way I should go with it. There are the obvious best songs, best albums, etc. I'd love some off the wall ideas. Leave some suggestions or maybe just your thoughts on Everclear - positive or negative - in the comment box.


:: Ryan 8:12 PM [+] ::
...
:: Sunday, September 14, 2003 ::
Guilty, Guilty, Guily

Here's another one from D:
Top 5 guilty pleasures. You know, the top five things you are ashamed to admit you like. For me it's Hoku. She gets me every time.


There are so many things every person likes that they're ashamed to admit and I'm certainly no different. To say the least this wasn't the easiest list to put together. So, I tried to think of the things I get the wierdest reaction for when I mention them. It's not so much that I'm ashamed I like these things as it is other people think I should be ashamed for liking them. Get it? Got it? Good.


1. Hootie and the Blowfish
- This is a no brainer. Cracked Rear View was one of the first CDs I ever bought and I still think it's a great record. I understand I'm not in an exclusive 'Cracked Rear View ownership' club, seeing how Hootie sold nearly 15 million copies of that album, but I find it hard to find A) people who admit they have it and B) anyone that will say they still like it. Not only have I seen this band live 5 or 6 times (who loses count of the amount of times they've seen Hootie and the Blowfish?!), but I've seen them as recently as the past year. I would have seen them a month ago but unfortunately I had to work and couldn't go. Even when I get someone who says "yea, I have that CD", it's usually followed by "I haven't listened to that in years." I listened to it last week. Is that wrong?

2. Cheesy Sports Movies
- Every Sports fan knows The Natural, Field of Dreams, Brian's Song, etc. Those are legitimate classics and I love those movies. But the movies I'm talking about aren't generally considered "classics". In fact most aren't considered much of anything. I think they're great though. How could you not like the Scott Bakula flick Necessary Roughness? A football movie about a bunch of rag tag college football players no one else wants? Or Thomas Ian Nicholas playing a normal kid turned major league pitcher in Rookie of the Year long before he blew a load into a cup of beer in American Pie. Don't forget about The Replacements starring Keanu Reeves as a down on his luck (it's a theme in these movies) ex-quarterback who is called back into action by coach Gene Hackman to lead a bunch of scabs while the real players are on strike. I bet you've never even heard of Talent for the Game. It stars Edward James Olmos as Virgil Sweet, a (here it comes again) down on his luck talent scout for the Angels who stumbles upon good 'ole country boy Sammy Bodeen who has zero pro experience but an arm that has never been seen before. Evil money hungry owners try to turn sweet Sammy into quick cash and Virgil doesn't know what to do! These are great!

3. Loveline
- I used to watch this on MTV and I was never really all that impressed, but about a year ago I started running the board locally for the show and thus had to listen once a week. I've sort of been hooked since. Now I don't listen religiously, but I get out of work every night around 10 and listen to the show most of the way home. The idiotic blabbing of Adam and intelligence of Dr. Drew is the perfect combo. I sometimes wish I had some twisted problem I needed fixed just so I could be a part of the zanyness, but (un)fortunately my life isn't exciting enough for Adam to make fun of on the radio.

4. That 'Other' Late Night Talk Show
- Letterman's my favorite. Always has been and always will be. But there's another guy I catch a lot of flack for watching. I really enjoy Kilborn. I know what you're gonna say. But why do people hate Craig Kilborn so much? Yes, he loves himself very much and lives on sarcasm, but is that any reason not to watch Craigers (as Janeane Garofalo calls him)? The one drawback -- obviously a big one -- is that he does have trouble getting top flight guests, but to his credit he even made the father from 7th Heaven seem interesting. Making a dull guest interesting is a skill that David Letterman has perfected and Kilborn is the only other person in late night that comes close. Plus, Kilborn gets Dave Grohl to come on just for the hell of it every couple weeks it seems and you can't beat that with a stick. Him and I have to fight over Dido, but we'll leave that discussion for a different list.

5. Fantasy Sports
- I'm a dork. I'm a nerd. I'm a _____ (enter best shot there). Now that I got that out of the way: this stuff is more addictive than heroin and more enjoyable than porn. Not that I know much about either.... anyways. As long as I'm talking to another 20-something male, I know I won't get the "that's so lame" line, but anyone else and 9 times out of 10 I get that look. You know the look I'm talking about. That look. The "awe... that's sad" look. The same look I'll give you when you tell me about your love of Dungeons and Dragons. I understand that if you aren't a big sports fan, fantasy sports make zero sense to you, but isn't it better to know that I look at Fantasy Sports Weekly in Barnes & Noble and not Playboy?

:: Ryan 5:49 AM [+] ::
...
:: Thursday, September 11, 2003 ::
Into the Fire
--Bruce Springsteen--


The sky was falling and streaked with blood
I heard you calling me, then you disappeared into the dust
Up the stairs, into the fire
Up the stairs, into the fire
I need your kiss, but love and duty called you someplace higher
Somewhere up the stairs, into the fire

May your strength give us strength
May you faith give us faith
May your hope give us hope
May your love give us love

May your strength give us strength
May you faith give us faith
May your hope give us hope
May your love give us love

You gave your love to see, in fields of red and autumn brown
You gave your love to me and lay your young body down
Up the stairs, into the fire
Up the stairs, into the fire
I need you near, but love and duty called you someplace higher
Someplace up the stairs, into the fire

May your strength give us strength
May your faith give us faith
May your hope give us hope
May your love give us hope

May your strength give us strength
May you faith give us faith
May your hope give us hope
May your love give us love

May your strength give us strength
May you faith give us faith
May your hope give us hope
May your love give us love

It was dark, too dark to see
You held me in the light you gave
You lay your hand on me
Then walked into the darkness of your smoky grave
Up the stairs, into the fire
Up the stairs, into the fire
I need your kiss, but love and duty called you someplace higher
Somewhere up the stairs, into the fire

May your strength give us strength
May your faith give us faith
May your hope give us hope
May your love bring us love...

May your love bring us love

:: Ryan 6:29 PM [+] ::
...
:: Wednesday, September 10, 2003 ::
Another Recall?

From D:
So California is having a little snafu with the governor. Being a proud New Jersian... What if we had the same deal in New Jersey? What would be your top 5 possible governors for The Jerz?

1. Bruce Springsteen
- Was there every any doubt about this one? He is already seen as 'Mr. New Jersey', so why not actually run the state. Bruce has made a few references to politics in the past and certainly would have enough support to make a run at Governor. Greetings from the Governor's Mansion? Little Stevie Van Zandt can be his Lt. Governor and "Born to Run" can be their campaign song. Perfect!

2. Kevin Smith
- The author of the 'Jersey Trilogy' would be a great choice for Jersey. Those 'come to Jersey' commercials could just be clips from his various films. Ben Aflleck and Matt Damon can run with him as co-lieutenant Governors. Kevin would bring out a record number of young voters -- specifically males -- to the polls with Affleck and Damon picking up the female vote. A whole new View Askewniverse.

3. Richie Sambora
- Curveball! I know you weren't expecting this one. You thought Mr. Jovi would be the obvious candidate, but Bon decides to sit this election out, letting his guitarist step up to the plate. Richie obviously has the Bon Jovi following to rely on, but his wife's fame won't hurt either. The aforementioned Heather Locklear will not only be the First Lady of New Jersey, but will serve as his Lt. Governor.

4. Tara Reid
- She wouldn't be a choice of mine to run, but every election needs a Gary Coleman type and she's stupid enough to think she can actually win. Her equally idiotic friend Lizzie Grubman will be her campaign manager and try to run down all the other candidates with her car. Reid, the 'bad girl' candidate, will pick the ultimate 'bad boy' -- Giant TE Jeremy Shockey -- as her running mate. Their slogan: "Everyone should get paid and get laid! .... except the homos." Morons.

5. Whitney Houston
- I really had trouble thinking of a fifth legitimate candidate. How could I have ever forgotten Whitney Houston? The pride of Newark! Whitney would be the best Governor to fight the drug problem because she'd make sure it was off the street and up her nose. Imagine the late night police visits to the Governor's mansion in Princeton, it would be hilarious! They'd be able to tape an episode of Cops there every week. Bobby Brown would of course be her Lt. Governor, doing all of the 'extra duties' his wife can't handle. And by extra duties I mean coke.

Editor's Note:
New Jersey doesn't actually have a Lieutenant Governor but for the sake of this list lets imagine it does. You can find out more than you ever wanted to about the New Jersey Governor by clicking here.


:: Ryan 9:12 PM [+] ::
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:: Sunday, August 31, 2003 ::
Yea, so the comments are being a pain in the ass. Sometimes they work and sometimes they don't. YACCS swears they'll be up and running after the holiday. We'll see how that works. When the comments aren't working, send me an IM with any suggestions.

:: Ryan 8:02 AM [+] ::
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:: Saturday, August 30, 2003 ::
I was talking to D a little while ago and we both decided that I didn't post nearly enough on this site. She suggested I write more about my life, but I don't think that would be interesting to anyone so that was out. Plus I've been putting most of my focus on my sports site, which doesn't do it for people like D (read "cool people"). If I was to keep this site going it really had to be more interactive so that anyone visiting can be a part of what's being written. So after a random comment on her blog (which is amazing by the way) about a few of the lists I have written up in the past, I thought maybe I could post all kinds of different lists. Instead of just the big end of year 'Top 20 Albums' there could be lists for anything. Depending on how in depth I can go the list could be Top 3, 5 or 10. The best part, which would make the site so much more interactive, is you -- the reader -- would click on the comment button and suggest a list you'd like to see my opinion on. Then you -- still the reader -- can post a response with your own Top 5/10 and where you dis/agree with mine.

It might not win any awards, but it's head and shoulders better than anything I've been doing with this lately (Phoe's interview not withstanding). So think up something you'd like to see a Top 3/5/10 for and leave it in the comments section. Don't forget to head over to D's site and leave a comment thanking her for helping this site not suck anymore.

Or at the very least suck less.

:: Ryan 2:22 AM [+] ::
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:: Friday, August 15, 2003 ::
Interview meme. These are the rules
1. Leave a comment in this post saying you want to be interviewed.
2. I'll give you your questions in the same thread.
3. You post the questions in your own Blog/LJ/whatever, along with their answers, as well as this message.
4. People reply to your post asking to be interviewed, and you give them questions of your own.
5. Rinse and repeat.
These questions were asked of me by Phoe of Hastily Prepared.

1. What is your favorite Everclear song, and why? If you can't narrow it down, I'll grudgingly accept the title of your favorite Everclear album.

I could probably go on for hours about which ones I like best, but for the few people that read this I’ll try to make it short but just picking one favorite and a few that are close behind. With any artist, it probably changes with my moods, but there’s a song off their first album called “Nervous and Weird” which is at the top of my list pretty consistently. There’s one lyric that always sticks with me: ‘I think I’m better now than how I used to be.’ That summed up my high school years and so while everyone else was quoting Shakespeare or Frost in the yearbook, I was quoting Alexakis. A close second is a B-Side called “For Pete’s Sake”. Rounding out the top five are “Strawberry”, “Sparkle” and “Summerland”. As a bonus, my favorite record is easily Sparkle and Fade. Although I’m sure the title of the site told you that much. I can pinpoint the time in my life where my passion for music changed and it was when I bought that album.

2. Okay, you've heard of EVERY band I've ever mentioned to you, however obscure, plus you know about all these other bands I've never heard of. Where do you get the time to listen to all this music?

Ever since early in high school, my life has completely revolved around music. In high school all of my money went to buying CDs, concert tickets and anything else music related. Then in college I was surrounded by even more music as a DJ (all 4 years) and then eventually Music Director (3 years) at the on campus radio station. Also, I got to work for Sony Music for 3 years which exposed me to a ton of new music and really gave me a new passion for music. Just from working with the Sony artists I got to see literally hundreds of other non-Sony bands who happened to be on the same bill. While I no longer have much desire to work in the record industry, I cannot fully explain how lucky I feel to have been able to work for Sony Music. So to make a long story longer, I haven’t really had to find or ‘get’ time to listen to new music, it’s just constantly been a part of my life and I couldn’t be happier about it.

3. Who is your favorite A-Team character and why?

I was always a fan of Face because he was what guys wanted to be like. He always drove a sweet car, got any girl he wanted, and could kick some major ass. No matter what the situation, Face would always exude confidence. Guns in his face? Confidence. Girl playing hard to get? Confidence. The man trying to hold him down? Confidence.

4. What do you find most appealing about working in radio?

Yikes. Another one I could go on for hours about. But again, I’ll try to think of the few people reading and make it as short as possible. The most appealing aspect of working in radio for me is that I enjoy everything I do. I feel very lucky to be able to say that about my career. Sure, I’m far from getting rich but I’d rather look forward to going to work everyday than make twice the money and dread getting in the car every morning.

5. What's the square root of pi over cosine theta?

That isn’t a completely answerable question, but I’ll give the closest thing to an answer that the rules of math allow. This is the basic theory: .EQ e sup x = 1 + x + x sup 2 over 2! + x sup 3 over 3! + x sup 4 over 4! + x sup 5 over 5! + x sup 6 over 6! + x sup 7 over 7! + ... .EN .EQ sin( theta ) = theta - theta sup 3 over 3! + theta sup 5 over 5! - theta sup 7 over 7! + ... .EN .EQ cos( theta ) = 1 - theta sup 2 over 2! + theta sup 4 over 4! - theta sup 6 over 6! + ... .EN Letting $x = i theta$, Euler's formula becomes obvious to the most casual observer: .EQ e sup x = mark 1 + x + x sup 2 over 2! + x sup 3 over 3! + x sup 4 over 4! + x sup 5 over 5! + x sup 6 over 6! + x sup 7 over 7! + ... .EN .EQ define y % { ( i theta ) } % = lineup mark 1 + y + y sup 2 over 2! + y sup 3 over 3! + y sup 4 over 4! + y sup 5 over 5! + y sup 6 over 6! + y sup 7 over 7! + ... .EN .EQ = lineup 1 - theta sup 2 over 2! + theta sup 4 over 4! - theta sup 6 over 6! + ... + i ( theta - theta sup 3 over 3! + theta sup 5 over 5! - theta sup 7 over 7! + ...) .EN which looks surprisingly like .EQ e sup { i theta } = cos( theta ) + i ~ sin( theta ) .EN

:: Ryan 8:07 PM [+] ::
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:: Wednesday, August 06, 2003 ::
The Best of Fall, Glimmer, Sparkle and Fade Part 2
Posted July 16, 2002.


I was reading an interview on ESPN.com with Kevin Garnett and thought some of it was worth sharing. You can read the entire thing here. The interview was filmed for a future And 1 commercial, but all the answers were completely unscripted. Here's part of what the 26 year-old whose present contract is worth $126,006,000 had to say:

Question: Are you overpaid?
KG: Hell no. If anything I'm underpaid, with everything I do. That's a ridiculous question. I have to do everything for this team.

Q: Word on the street is that you're soft in the fourth quarter.
KG: Fuck you talkin' about? That's not what I hear.

Q: What do you hear?
KG: That KG is the motherfucking shit. N----s know. My peers in the league know what I'm about.

Q: What have you learned about the fourth quarter?
KG: To not pass the ball if we're losing.

Q: Has Kobe ever dunked on you?
KG: That's a stupid question. No. Kobe has never dunked on me in his life.

Q: Why did you skip college?
KG: At the time I felt like going pro was the only way I was going to make something of my life. Besides, college ain't shit. It's like slavery, they're trying to fuck the kids. You gotta get your education but I made a decision for me.
I've never heard college compared to slavery before. Money can buy a lot of things, but it obviously can't buy intelligence.

:: Ryan 3:09 AM [+] ::
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:: Saturday, August 02, 2003 ::
Okay, so oddly enough, the day after I re-post my A-Team movie thoughts I read that it's in pre-production and two actors have already signed on to do it. Now to say I'm disappointed with the early choices in an understatment. Owen Wilson has reportedly been cast to play Murdoch. This is the one character I wasn't able to come up with an actor for, so I guess I can't completely blame the producers for coming up with Wilson if I couldn't come up with anyone. The second name is the one that makes no sense whatsoever. Brendan Fraser as Face. How in good God's name does Brendan Fraser get this role? If this movie is going to be successful, you would figure they're gonna need bigger names than Owen Wilson and Brendan Fraser.

I stumbled across some other random sites suggesting Mel Gibson play Hannibal. This is the type of star they would need in this film, although there hasn't been any mentions of him in over a year. Oh well. The other name I saw floating around the first time this movie was trying to get off the ground was Taye Diggs as BA. Casting Diggs would be almost as bad as Fraser as Face.

Any ideas?

:: Ryan 9:37 PM [+] ::
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:: Sunday, July 27, 2003 ::
Since I can't figure out what, if anything, to do with this site. I guess a 'Best Of' post will have to do for now. So here is a rant that was first posted on March 22, 2002.

The Best of Fall, Glimmer, Sparkle and Fade Part 1


It started as a joke. Just a passing comment. But after talking about it for a while, it really doesn't seem like something that far out of the realm of possibility. I'm, of course, talking about 'The A-Team' Movie. Before you think it wouldn't work, just think about it. They made a 'Charlie's Angles' movie for christ's sake. The most important part of such a movie, even before the story, is the casting. A friend of mine and I came up with a very preliminary list, but let me know what you think. For the part of Hanibal, there were a lot of names we were throwing around. Harrison Ford: maybe. Tommy Lee Jones: not smug enough. The person we both thought could possibly do the best job is Bruce Willis. Wait, wait, wait, just hear me out. If you are bored, watch an episode of the show and i promise you will be able to see Bruce playing that role. The next role that needs to be cast is Face. Not that easy of a job. I suggested Jason Lee, but as much as I like him, he isn't quite to the level of stardom the producers would be looking for and he isn't really a 'stud'. Hugh Jackman(sp?) might work, but definately doesn't have the star power yet to join this cast. Matt Damon was mentioned for a second, but he isn't quite charismatic enough, although he has the looks. My other suggestion and our best choice so far is Brad Pitt. He certainly has the attitude, he's likeable and he obviously has the looks. The easiest of the roles to cast is that of Mr. T's character BA. I don't see any reason why Michael Clarke Duncan couldn't play the role. Plus, he's co-starred with Bruce Willis before, so they would definately have the chemistry. The hardest role to cast is that of Murdoch(sp?). It was suggested, although I disagreed, that Jim Carrey could play the role. I just could never see Jim having a role in any form of action movie, even if the character he's playing is supposed to be a little 'disturbed'. I again suggested Jason Lee even though I know he wouldn't really fit in the role, I just like to see him get roles with really big names. We weren't happy with anyone we mentioned to play Murdoch, so that's still up in the air... any ideas? Does this all sound crazy? Good. I can see it now: the trailer that has been approved for all audiences playing for a packed house. The cast: Bruce Willis, Brad Pitt, Michael Clarke Duncan and _____. After a montage of action shots from the flick, it ends with Bruce Willis holding a cigar saying 'I love it when a plan comes together.' This could be HUGE!

:: Ryan 12:35 AM [+] ::
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:: Thursday, June 26, 2003 ::
NBA.com published my thoughts. Copy and paste the link into your browser:

http://www.nba.com/draft2003/sprite_fourth.html

:: Ryan 2:10 PM [+] ::
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:: Wednesday, June 25, 2003 ::
This was a lot tougher than I thought it was going to be. I asked a bunch of people what the soundtrack of their life would sound like. The responses were remarkably different. The most common answer was that it should just be made up of your favorite songs. Others suggested it should have sections by age. When I first thought about it I put it into a movie scenario. Meaning it would correspond with a film made about my life. However, how many movies cover someone's entire life in depth? Not many. So I had to come up with a time frame for my film to take place. I'm the first to admit my life hasn't exactly been the most enthralling 22 years, but there have been some entertaining moments. After a lot of contemplation I decided any film based, probably loosely, on my life would take place sometime during my college career. That takes out a lot of the music I grew up listening to -- Billy Joel, Genesis, etc.. -- mainly because I couldn't really see any songs from those artists fitting into a film scene. Because remember, any song making it onto the soundtrack has to appear in the film. This prevented me from simply picking my favorite song from an artist, instead I had to find a song I thought could be played in a scene and make sense.

I went through several different versions before I settled on the final track listing. All the songs fit in nicely just under 80 minutes, the perfect length to keep it from stretching over two discs. Without further delay, here is the soundtrack to the movie of my life with some more comments below.

1) Hootie and the Blowfish "Hannah Jane"
2) Fountains of Wayne "Radiation Vibe"
3) Pete Yorn "For Nancy"
4) John Mayer "No Such Thing"
5) Jude "I'm Sorry Now"
6) Our Lady Peace "Life"
7) Goo Goo Dolls "Name"
8) Everclear "Learning How To Smile"
9) For Squirrels "Under Smithville"
10) Buckcherry "For The Movies"
11) Foo Fighters "Everlong"
12) Tenacious D "Inward Singing"
13) Bloodhound Gang "Mope"
14) Led Zeppelin "Ramble On"
15) Bruce Springsteen "Born To Run"
16) Third Eye Blind "Motorcycle Drive By"
17) Ben Folds Five "Evaporated"
18) Better Than Ezra "This Time Of Year"
19) The Refreshments "Mekong"


There it is! Download it, burn it, love it. There is definitely a good mix of stuff on there. From the obscure (I can hear each and everyone one of you saying to yourself 'Who are the For Squirrels') to the massively successful ("No Such Thing", "Name") to the older stuff ("Ramble On" and the Boss), there's a little something for everyone here. The Tenacious D track is there because they would OBVIOUSLY make a cameo appearance in the film as college roommates discussing Jack's theory of 'inward singing'. And even though the role as me has been tabbed to be Brad Pitt, I might be willing to let Jack Black do his magic as the leading character.

I think I was able to do a pretty good job with the song order. Transition from one track to the next is pretty decent throughout the disc, with the "Mope" to "Ramble On" segue being the only questionable one in my mind. There's also a song for every type of scene with the exception of the "dance club" scenes... oh wait, there wouldn't be any of those, which means I've off the hook for that one. The Zep, Boss, Bloodhound Gang and Refreshments are great bar scene songs. "Evaporated" is a beautiful song that can definitely handle the saddest/most dramatic scene of the picture. The rest of them are pretty versatile in how they could be used in a movie.

Next time you're really, really, really bored I implore you to try putting one of these lists together. It's not as easy as you might think. But I do hope you enjoyed this, because I really did have a good time putting it together. However, while I was doing it I decided this would probably be my last post on this page as you know it. Oh don't worry, you can't get rid of me that easily, this site will most definitely still exist. I'm just going to try and give it a complete overhaul. I've started with some of the links and if I can find a better looking template then I'll change that too. The biggest change will be the content of the page. I know you're all dying in anticipation of just what that will be, but you'll have to wait for the debut of the site's new look to find out. I'm also going to debut something else that is completely new in the very near future. Stay tuned.

This is what a college graduate does with his time.

:: Ryan 3:57 AM [+] ::
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:: Tuesday, June 10, 2003 ::
What would be on the soundtrack to your life?

:: Ryan 4:02 PM [+] ::
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:: Saturday, March 29, 2003 ::
If you are a sports fan you need to read THIS.

Further proof that ESPN.com is the best site ever.


:: Ryan 12:27 AM [+] ::
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:: Thursday, March 27, 2003 ::
Listen to my favorite music:
HERE

I'm pretty sure you need a Yahoo! ID, but it has some quality music

:: Ryan 3:28 AM [+] ::
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:: Wednesday, February 26, 2003 ::
Awards shows don't normally rub me the wrong way. Basically, because I don't feel as if they truly mean anything in the long run. The last time I cared about any awards show was last years Academy Awards when "In The Bedroom" was completely ignored, despite the fact that it should have one every category it was nominated in and some that it wasn't. I can't even remember the last time I cared about a music awards show.

This year was different. Finally a show had a purpose. And the Grammy's just fucked it up.

This was Bruce's year. The Boss was nominated for a slew of awards and was going to walk home with every single one he was nominated for and all the papers across the country would have a picture of him standing in the media room having trouble holding all of his brand new awards. Bruce helped to heal a nation when it needed it the most and he was finally going to get some official recognition. He was to be the guest of honor at the 'biggest' music awards show of the year. The powers that be scheduled him to perform not once, but TWICE. First, an amazing performance of 'The Rising' followed later in the evening as part of a tribute to The Clash with Dave Grohl, who is starting to turn into the next Springsteen. What a fitting tribute it would be to this great musician, storyteller and man. Then, as it is accustomed to doing, the Grammy's dropped the proverbial glass ball and it shattered all over the ground in front of a global television audience.

It has nothing to do with opinions or musical preferences, everyone sitting in Madison Square Garden along with the billions watching around the world knew what had to be done. The first broadcast award he was up for, the crowd in the Garden was chanting "Bruuuuuuuuuuce", because they knew he was going to win. He had to. It was his time to be recognized in the city he helped to emotionally mend. Hollywood could not have written a better story line. "..and the Grammy goes to...(as if they even needed to open the envelope).... Norah Jones?" The announcement of the 'winner' even sounded full of doubt. The presenters looked like someone had passed gas, but that no one was quite sure who. There they were, thinking to themselves: "Was this the right envelope? C'mon, there's no way we came out here to give an award to Norah Jones over Bruce Springsteen". Unfortunately that was the case. No typo. No misplaced envelope. Everyone in MSG was confused, but they were able to breathe a little easier because he was still going to bring home the rest of the awards he was nominated for. Of course, what were they thinking? Sure, he didn't win the first one he was nominated for, because I'm sure they wanted to at least try to spread around the awards early on. But no one should worry, because obviously the rest of the night would belong to The Boss.

Immediately following his performance of 'The Rising', they were presenting Song of the Year. Of course, this is why they waited so long to give Bruce his first televised Grammy, because now they already have him up on stage so they can kill two birds with one stone. What a great idea! The crowd is still buzzing from the performance and can't wait to give Bruce another standing ovation. Again, the "Bruuuuuuuuuce" chants start up except this time they're even louder. Seriously, should they even open the envelope when it's so clear who is going to win? Well, I suppose to make it 'official' they should read from the envelope. "... and the Grammy goes to... Norah Jones?" Okay, now everyone's realllllly confused. How does a woman that didn't even write the only song of hers that matters beat Bruce Springsteen? It seemed as if an appropriate song to play would have been The Ramones 'Beat on the Brat', except a SPECIAL Grammy version entitled 'Beat on the Boss'. If people in the world were sick of long award shows before this disaster, they're fucking done with them now.

Yes, I understand Bruce still went home with three Grammy awards. And I'm well aware that no matter how many awards they give Norah Jones, she's still going to be playing in airport lounges in two years. The Boss had earned a certain level of respect that the people at the Grammy's were unwilling to acknowledge. Sure, we'll give him awards but why should we actually let him be recognized on stage in front of the city that is so grateful for all he has done? Why should he be able to thank all those that made it possible for him to make that record in front of billions of people? Fuck him. He's on his way out, let's let this piano-playing Britney get the entire spotlight so our broadcast will seem 'hip' and 'cool'. Yea, that's what we should do. Because the kids love things that are 'hip' and 'cool'. And the 'hip' and 'cool' Norah Jones will be around much longer than someone the likes of Bruce Springsteen. Just ask Hanson and the Spice Girls.

:: Ryan 4:08 AM [+] ::
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:: Friday, February 14, 2003 ::
I'm never completely sure just what I'm supposed to post on this site. Mainly because I don't think the day to day activities in my life would be all that exciting to any of you out there. I always have a good time, but I know from reading other people's blogs that 'good times' don't always turn into 'good blogs'. However...

I hit a pole Monday.

As you can imagine, it sort of killed the whole night. Things were going really well too: I don't have classes on Monday, which means sleeping until at least noon. Then an unusually short (20 min) meeting that would normally take a good hour or so right before a Quinnipiac basketball game, which to top the day off was the best of the season despite it being a loss. The damn snow couldn't just let me get back to my apartment and just enjoy my fine Monday. Nooooooooo, that would be too easy for the snow.

I take a back road to get to my apartment from school and in retrospect -- hindsight is 20/20 -- I should have taken the highway just because it would have been plowed/salted/etc, but it's a bit too late for that now. Anyway... I'm not even five minutes from school when I lose control of my back wheels. Now I grew up in the Northeast, so I know how to handle my car in the snow. So after I the back of the car starts floating to the left, I quickly readjust and my car is straight again. Problem averted. Right? Wrong. Sure, the car is straight but now all four wheels are gliding on ice under the snow. Even though the car is happily gliding along in a straight line, the road isn't being quite as cooperative because it's decided to have a turn to the left and it quickly became apparent to me this telephone pole coming up wasn't going to be moving anytime soon. I realized there wasn't anything I could do and just helplessly held the wheel while by baby green jeep got it's brains beat to shit by a telephone pole.

After I took a look around the car to make sure no one had been killed or hurt, I automatically thought my car was done. The sound it made when it came into contact with the pole would have brought tears to any Jeep owner's eyes. To be honest with you, before I stepped out of the car to take a look at the damage I thought it was all over. I thought I'd have to send my dearest Jeep off to the land of beautiful dead Jeeps. However, I was pleasantly surprised when I saw that the metal fender took most of the impact and the grill on the car wasn't even smashed. There wasn't any smoke, broken glass or anything of the sort. I let out a huge sigh of relief... well as big of a sigh you can let out after you drive straight into a pole.

Now I get to deal with paying for my baby to get fixed, which is going to end up being fairly expensive. I realize having to repair my car is much better than doctors having to repair my arms or legs, I really do. But my not being injured in the accident doesn't make me two grand richer. So if anyone wants to help out with the repair costs, I will welcome any and all donations. Please send checks or money orders, made out to Ryan Jones, to:

Ryan Jones
The Help Repair Ryan's Beautiful But Injured Green Jeep Fund
c/o WQAQ
275 Mount Carmel Ave.
Hamden, CT 06518

:: Ryan 3:11 AM [+] ::
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